I have already written about the difference between self-esteem and self-worth (here). Today, I would like to mention the impacts that the illusion of self-esteem creates on leadership.
We glorify achievement, status, and external validation.
We measure ourselves, and are measured, by what we do and how we perform.
That’s fragile self-esteem, fleeting, and dependent on others’ approval.
What about self-worth? That unwavering sense that we are enough, regardless of titles, achievements, or accolades?
I, like many of you out there, used to thrive on chasing success defined by others. I proved myself one accomplishment after another. The high-performing executive on the fast track.
And deep down? How many of you despite the prestigious work/accomplishments feel empty?
In leadership, we see this everywhere. Highly competent people that appear confident on the outside and that inside are struggling with self-doubt and burnout. Why? Because we’re driven by esteem, not worth. Please remember: we can have high self-esteem and low (very low) self-worth.
I want you to think and reflect on:
• Do you measure your value by productivity and performance?
• How much of your leadership identity is shaped by doing versus being?
• What if we valued self-worth as much as performance, what would change?
I am not suggesting you to drop your goals or prestigious careers, I am asking you to accept your messy, imperfect, ever-evolving selves. This is self-compassion. Leadership in 21st Century needs to me more than effective; it needs to be caring, compassionate and courageous.
I invite you to challenge the self-esteem narrative in your workplace and make room for creative, unstructured practices that let you be without judgment; like Messy Art, which taught me to embrace my humanity beyond perfection.
What stories are you telling yourself about your worth? Are they yours or borrowed from a society obsessed with success?
I like to refer to leadership as Humanship. Lead not just with confidence, but with integrity!
I invite you to embody a leadership presence that is grounded in compassion, care, collaboration, and courage.
If you are looking for developing a leadership capable of fostering organisational and individual flourishment have a look at our program Artful Leadership and all other Artful Programs.
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