Poetry is how I understand the world and make sense of my human experience. It is the voice of my true essence. I would love us to explore together, through poetry, one of the essences of the being human: love. Love is what we are here for, we all want to be loved, all of us, no exceptions.
Alfred Kreymborg in his poem Credo wrote:
I sing the will to love
the will that carves the will to live,
the will that saps the will to hurt,
the will that kills the will to die;
the will that made and keeps you warm,
the will that points your eyes ahead,
the will that makes you give, not get,
a give and get that tell us what you are:
how much a god, how much a human.
I call on you to live the will to love.
It is a prayer and a call for action to love. Love is a verb and as any verb indicates an action. It requires we act upon it. So often we use this word and not that often we actually act upon it. Love isn’t just romance, it is a bridge we build to close gaps, to understand, to empathise... We cannot transmute existing inequities and the systems that perpetuate them without understanding how they function, and how they shape the experiences of the people whose lives are impacted by them every day. When we can express pain, anger, and the desire for this transformation with love, we are given the gift of life. The gift we get in return is our humanity.
Kreymborg called us "to live the will to love", that shows up in our willingness to become and be agents of kindness, compassion, generosity. Let’s honour and celebrate each other’s differences, make room for each other’s humanity and be the bridge that unite us all.
But remember, love is a verb and it requires an action; the action of grounding ourselves and setting clear boundaries. The more grounded we allow our life to get, the less we will be knocked off our centre. These boundaries are the key elements that make us available to receive the gifts that life is giving us. Too often we confuse boundaries with barriers. Imagine a boundary as a permeable membrane that allows the exchanges of air, nutrients, information…all we need to grow. Barriers are instead those walls we build to defend, resist and even attack. Boundaries enable connection and the ability to receive while barriers favour isolation and lead to starvation.
When we realise this difference, it becomes easier to discern and choose how to act. Yet, I know, it is easier said than practiced. Have you ever found yourself needing an excuse or even a lie to be able to say no or to be just who you are? That is a clear sign of not having clear boundaries. We then get frustrated at the world or at others because we are not loved or accepted for who we are. I am inviting you to reflect on this question: “what it is that you need to have the will to love a bit more about yourself?”
Setting boundaries will support also our ability to stay away from sacrifice, both at work and in any other relationship. When we sacrifice, we are basically enslaving ourselves to a situation or to someone, we feel either we have to carry the situation or someone or feel we feel we have to give up our own life in order to receive love or approval.
As those boundaries become stronger we too become stronger in showing up for who we really are and what we really want. When we deny to ourselves this opportunity we deny it to others too. I believe that when we are dissatisfied we need to ask ourselves if and how we have participated and contributed to it and then choose not to continue doing so. It might take time and practice but it starts with the choice of setting boundaries, the boundaries where love can flourish.
This is an excerpt from Freevolution to inspire you on your day: “We all look from love or run from it”.
On the 7th November at 6:00 pm CET I will offer a free webinar on the private Freevolutioners’ page to expand on boundaries, love, self-worth and answer to your questions. Let me know if you have got your copy of Freevolution and I will invite you to the private Freevolutioners’ page.
If you’re interested to learn more about our knowledge and experience and discuss how we could help through our consultancy, workshops, and talks, drop us a line at fateme@rnewb.com.